Giggling Barbers

If cab drivers are known for being chatty then barbers should surely be known for their banter and jokes. Maybe barbers are more known for their sage wisdom but if this is the case it’s way off the mark! Go hang out at Pall Mall Barbers for an afternoon and you’ll hear and see the staff tease each other, banter with their clients and generally keep themselves amused with their bizarre sense of humour. It’s a great environment for comedy. It’s a close intimate space, your “audience” is present/held hostage for a perfect amount of time (a stand up set of about 20 minutes) and most importantly the customer always has to laugh as the barber’s the one holding the sharp implement…




When I look at the Pall Mall Barbers’ website, specifically the biogs, I’m struck by two things. Firstly, the barbers have such wildly different interests outside of work and secondly the whole Top Trumps layout of the biogs suggests a mischievous silliness, which is far from guaranteed in the workspace. I’ve worked in many different environments from health club to the Ministry of Defence. The health club was without surprise the most superficial place I’ve worked at, though astonishingly the MoD contained characters that could give Eddie Izzard and the rest of the A list comedians a run for their money. The conversation based on everyone’s top 4 “short people” films still makes me giggle to this day (My favourite are: Freaks, Willow, Wizard of Oz and of course Star Wars; Return of the Jedi. Controversial I know but it’s full of furry, cuddly midgets).



The barber shop surpasses the comedy experience I gained at the Ministry of Defence though and I believe that’s a lot to do with the setting. The shop is geared to promote a feeling of relaxation, smartness and class. The open plan office that I worked in at the Ministry of Defence had none of these features. Coupled with this are all the comic props Morecambe and Wise would be proud of, by which I mean hair dryers, talcum powder, hair gel and of course, the hair trimmings. If you’re like me and even more like Rich you’ll love the humour based around the barber’s badger brush and the double entendres are endless.



So why have hairdressers not appeared more in British sitcoms? Of course the standout example is “Desmond’s” – a truly great comedy, in its time. I would however argue that Desmond’s is more about the Peckham community than it is about hairdressing – if I remember rightly there was very little to do with cutting hair – more “Pork Pie” bemoaning the latest mess he’d got himself into.

Good British sitcoms are incredibly varied – we’ve seen catastrophes take place in; hotels, health clubs, outer space and even more remote – the Yorkshire Dales. I guess it shows that good comedy is about clever character development and witty dialogue, but place setting has got to contribute massively. It is for this reason that I call forth – nay, clamour - for some classic barber shop comedy! It is what Britain requires, in fact we demand mishaps galore of a coiffed nature, set within the most quintessential of all British commercial settings; the castle of the high street, the retreat from a dangerous world, the sanctity of the great British comb over – we demand our British Barbers Comedy!


Bring me by Brush of burning gold
Bring me my Clippers of desire
Bring me my Talc oh clouds unfold
Bring me Scissors of fire
I will not cease from mental fight
Nor shall my Comb sleep in my hand
Till we have laughed and cried aloud
In England’s barbers across the land.
(Break out the organ solo).



Be advised – a storm is brewing at Paul, Mal and Barbara’s…


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